aliens among us

Ever been scared? Do you like scary movies? Ever had a nightmare? Do you want one? Oh, I know! Let’s do what you aliens do! Allow me to share.

Well boys and girls, It started out a much better day for the paravanes, than they’ve had in quite a while. Of course, those of us that like to live in the now do it because we know the nightmare is coming. Shh! Shh! Shh! We don’t talk like that! Or they, whoever the hell they are, will hear! They’ll come get us! Hide! Hide!

I bet some of you are wondering what this feels like? OK, try this exercise. Look around you. See all the people you love? Your wife, your husband, your children, you parents…oh, some of you do know what I’m talking about.

Now imagine that they aren’t there. You look around you, and they are just not there. Now imagine that in their minds, their thoughts, those little mice of memes that scurry through every one of our conscious moments, they really truly honest to god cross your heart and hope to die believe that you have betrayed them.

You are the reason they are gone. You called the bad people that took them away to the scary place and they don’t know anyone there, so come get me now, OK?

It started out a much better day for the paravanes than they’ve had in quite a while, boys and girls. I was given a small, almost microscopic pinch of hope. Of course, those of us that like to live in the now do it because we know the nightmare is coming.

But maybe, just maybe, they can do something to “fix” her. They can push a pill here, switch a chemical balance there, maybe apply just a little electroshock therapy…oh wait, they don’t do that any more because it’s inhumane, right?

Look around you and imagine that the people you care more about than yourself are in the “care” of other people. Professionals. Strangers. Not family.

The fun really begins later in the evening when the exhaustion trigger hits them, and you get a phone call from your loved one in this nice place where these professional people are taking good care of her, I mean come on, they let her use the phone, how bad can it be? “Jimmy!? Come get me right now! Right now! They are waiting to do something bad to me!”

Tomorrow, I’m going to be positive and happy. I’m going to get out of this hollow house and meet some nice people. I talked to some nice people today. It was pleasant. It was fun. I enjoyed it. Isn’t that special? “OK, it’s OK. I’m not mad. They are good people. You come get me tomorrow, OK? I go to sleep now. Jimmy?! OK? I love you. OK?”

Ever looked around in the dark and suddenly realized you were the monster? It’s not that I think they’ll do anything bad to her. It’s that I can’t help thinking I am. There is nothing quite like hearing your name turned into a plea for the fear to stop.

They think it might be either a change in the way her medications are interacting, possibly due to a change in her physiology? (I’m trying to quote stuff I don’t understand), and that they might be able to bring her out of the delerium and back to extended periods of clarity by making incremental adjustments in her medications at a time. They are also going to do a PETSCAN(?). Sorry too busy to do the usual google and link stuff.

I’m feeling much more optimistic today. You know, all you aliens and all yer prayers?

Thanks. I mean that more than I can express. If you ever need a kidney or something…(grin)